hear ye! hear me

8

May 8, 2012 by jooshanoosh

A few weeks ago I got all braggy on you and made you think that I’m a big star because I’m in a bunch of commercials. Well, nothing is further from the truth! I don’t get to be in very many commercials, and when I do they have chickens in them. But I do get a lot of voice over work, and I think you might be surprised by that fact and fascinated to learn more! In fact, for every dollar I make doing something on camera, I make ten yelling about charter schools and Durango 4X4’s into a microphone. But it’s vulgar to talk about money.

When I tell people that I do a lot of voice over work, generally people seemed surprised. The assumption, of course, is that to get hired you need to sound like the action movie trailer guy. I’ve never had a gravelly voice and I’m not willing to start smoking just to get one. I would only start smoking to look cool, and that’s it. But you might be interested in knowing that a lot of clients are looking for people who sound like people, and not the devil. So I get hired a lot! It’s exciting. I remember a “friend’ in college telling me that I would probably have a solid career in voice over because many people are looking to hire “flat, average voices.” Boy, was he right! That guy was a regular soothsayer! And also a giant tool.

A second misconception has nothing to do with the way I sound, but how I look. A lot of video editors spend hours listening to my voice as they piece together tv and radio spots. When they finally meet me, they invariably tell me that I look nothing like they pictured. They never say “you’re way more handsome!” But they don’t tell me I’m way uglier either, so you know me! I assume the latter. I don’t think my voice is all sexy or anything, and I don’t think anyone is picturing Ryan Gosling when I talk, but it’s possible that they do. Because people always seem a tad disappointed, as if they expected floppy hair or a fancy goatee.

Here is an example of some of the work I’ve done. In this spot I’m helping people become graphic designers:

So I’m not super handsome, and so I’m not super sporty. Lose the labels! I have a nice voice.

In this next spot, I show that I’m in favor of education for everyone. Even teens:

But let’s move this party out of the classroom and onto the street!

These are just samples of the magical web I weave! I’m not saying I’m more important than anyone else, I’m just saying that a lot of people buy cars and take classes at the simple command of my voice. It’s almost spooky the power I (assume) I (might) have. And it all takes place in a little padded both, or behind a simple drapery! Yes, just like the Wizard of Oz! L. Frank Baum must have seen our day.

Advertisements

8 thoughts on “hear ye! hear me

  1. Melanie says:

    Your voice almost lured me to do all of these things. It's powerful. Thank heavens for the amazing force field of self control I've built up around myself.

  2. Robbyn says:

    All I have to say is that your voice is deeper than I remember it. Maybe it's because I first knew you before you hit puberty. Also, I wish you were the one singing the song "buy better buy Hinkley."

  3. The Teej says:

    Are you absolutely SURE you aren't also the crazy fun science teacher setting some chemistry on fire in that Summit spot?

  4. Josh Bingham says:

    I like when you say "ram 2500 crew cab 4X4." It makes me giggle. Also, I had no idea you did voice over. Kudos.

  5. DeNae / SHP says:

    I've totally seen that one commercial! You know, where you tell us to do that one thing! Yeah! That one! (Actually, it's the label one.) But I can't fully support you in this work, because anyone who endorses education for teenagers clearly lacks judgment, or, at the very least, a memory of attempting to be educated in the presence of teenagers.

  6. Ken Craig says:

    Chris, with that on single commercial, you already know more about cars than I do. I'm not going to lie, I'm a little intimidated. Well played.

  7. Patrick says:

    Ken and Josh are right, it's the car one that gives you the most points. I mean, you ARE a professor, so we know you like people to pay money to go to schools and you also refuse to label people, that's always been you thing, but in the car one, any one that knows you, knows you are acting, only you sound like your not…which who knew you can act with your voice?! I can say anything I want with my eyes, but if I had to do that Car voice over it would have said, "Buy a Hybrid and save your gas money to put your unlabeled kids in a better high school."

  8. None of the commercials sound like I remember you sounding. My memory must suck. Good on ya.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Categories

%d bloggers like this: