October 2, 2012 by jooshanoosh
My wife and I sit around all year and wait for October. We used to over decorate the whole house and make delicious autumnal treats and throw a huge Halloween party every year, but now we have kids and don’t have time for such things. We literally, right this second, have a “Ghost Garland” from target that was purchased over a week ago that is only hanging by one side, the other cascading to the dinner table…not because it’s fallen, but because we only ever hung one side and then lost interest.
We used to begin watching season two of Buffy the Vampire Slayer (no one watches season one) mid September and would wrap up season seven just before Halloween. It was nice to come home and have your night all planned out for you; make dinner, watch Buffy; fold laundry, watch Buffy; hook up with spouse, pause Buffy. Easy. (Sorry, but is that how you use semi colons?) But now we have kids and we no longer do ANY of the a fore mentioned activities. (again, sorry, is that how you use ‘a fore’?)
One year, while living in New York City we found ourselves without a costume and had to whip something up because we wanted to go to the Halloween parade in Greenwich Village. This is what we came up with:
This was the last time we have dressed up for Halloween…because then…we got kids.
We no longer watch scary movies because the kids now creep into our room and it scares us.
We stopped buying holiday candy because we have kids and they would not eat anything else if they knew we had any.
We never say up past 10:30 (late, pref 9:45) because we have kids and no matter what time we go to bed they are coming for you at 6:45 am…with two nighttime wake ups…each.
It turns out that all the things you can’t wait to do as a kid, you really do get to do…until you have kids!
There is something to be said for getting to watch my kids have halloween, but they do it so poorly that it’s hardly worth mentioning. Milo is 4 months and rarely has much to contribute…except Exorcist style vomit which he offers up frequently. And Daisy is two and a half and thinks the cheesiest things are scary (ie ghost garland from target). Lindsay and I have perfected our singular mix of Victorian Gothic blended with Savannah Grave Yard with a dash of 1692 Salem Courthouse for our Halloween aesthetic and the kids just don’t get it. Which is fine by me, it’s a lot of effort to set it all up just to then have some two-and-a-half-year-old wrap the ends of our grey muslin tablecloth around her neck like a cape and tear off tipping the lit candelabra into the piles of Spanish Moss and antique Law Books deliberately scattered on both the table and floor igniting my effortless balance between dilapidated library and spell casters squat.
While it’s true I love my children, more then anything, it will be nice when they grow up and we can get back to having fun on Halloween.