October 9, 2012 by jooshanoosh
I use to think adoption was super scary, now I know, it’s just parenting that scary. However, there are times in our lives that are just going to be different then most. We have an open adoption with both our Birth Mothers, which is really the way most adoptions work these days, it’s better for the kids, it’s better for the Birth Moms, and it’s better for us…it’s just better. My wife’s motto is, you don’t talk about things you are ashamed of, and we are the opposite of ashamed about our adoptions…we are thrilled and proud and if you saw our kids you would understand…and also be a little disappointed in your own ability to procreate. One of the biggest things we want to avoid in our child’s lives is “The Moment”. That “Moment” when they were told they were adopted. So now it’s just sort of built into our lives, as evident by the other day:
The other day Daisy and I were picking up her toys, rather, I was picking up toys and she was telling me where to put them, which she would know, she got them out, and I came upon this little apron that belongs to this little rabbit.
As we were putting the apron back on the bunny I said to Daisy, “Did you know Daddy made this Bunny for you when you were in Gabby’s (name change) belly?”
She said, “Yeah.” then she left the room and came back in with the picture of Gabby we have framed in her room and said, “I came from Gabby’s belly!”
And I said, “That’s right, sweety.”
She thought for a moment and then she asked, “Who belly you come from?”
I said, “I came from Hommy John’s belly.” (Hommy is what we call Grandma’s even though we can all say Grandma very well. Also, my mom, in a twist of patriarchal foolery, somehow adopted my dad’s name into her’s, making her Hommy John…which is just as well, as she had five boys and put John in all five names…she was the only “Non-John” in the house…until now.)
Daisy said, “Oh…Whose belly Mommy come from?”
I answered, “Mommy came from Hommy Da’s belly.”
She then asked, “Whose belly Milo come from?”
“Milo came from Olivia’s belly.”
Then she thought for a second then said, “Well, we all come from someones belly.”
Simple. Thoughtful. Profound. And she’s only 2.
***Next week I am going to blog about how parents think their own kids are smarter, cleverer, and funnier then everyone else’s kids…which can’t be true…’cause I have Daisy.
See you then!